#117

on the other hand. you have different fingers.


I have so much to tell. Where can I start? Who shall be first?

Axel has made his presence. Ever so humble Axel hiding the shadows, learing into the daylight.

It didn't happen until the pains struck me. First in my lower back down into my lower sides. Lower..low like a passion with a push that pulsed through every fiber of my body that ended finally in a scream.

But it was a false alarm.

"How nice of you to join me." I finally said wanting to plop myself in a nearby stream, but only managed short of it on the rocks.

"You don't look so good." He shrugged and sat on a rock next to me.

"You wouldn't look so well either if you were in my condition, but then again you're just a pixie. Do pixies have babies, anyway?"

"Um, not like this as long as I can remember, but then I've been far away from home for a long time. Things could have changed." He skipped a rock in the water below.

"So what made you come back?" Nothing I had said or did was the right thing. Not until now. Now he was here.

"What did you need me for?" He smiled then.

I closed my eyes wondering if it was really true. Did I not need him?

"Don't you know I'm everywhere you go. I've seen and been with you so many times. I see so many things through their eyes. Its hard to shake, you know. Its like I'm the inkling. The motive. The unsaid. Its hard to be in so many places at once.

Please forgive me. Will you do that much?"

I shook my head, yes all I really wanted was for him to hold me. For him to be close. I knew. I knew it all along. How could I hate and love him so much for so long.

Now if he could only will the baby here, things would be much better. Much much better.

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